Although up until now the summer had been crazy busy, full of activities,
filling out paperwork, DB events, family gatherings, church, I wasn't still
sure what the right decision was. If anyone out there was saying, "Wow, Marsha,
you have waited until the very very last minute to make this decision!".
My answer would be yes I have waited the very last minute I could.
Oh Decisions, decisions, decisions...making small ones, no big deal, making
big ones, is so hard.
The week before school starts, I am getting emails from the university,
about books, classes, professors, accommodations, and so on. I ignored them,
and then ignored them. But still in the back of my mind, niggling me to make
this decision was my uncertainty. So finally on Thursday, I filled out the
necessary paperwork for the university to take a Leave of Absence. I promptly
sent it off to my advisor, as if I had waited, I would have thought twice, and
could have still started school. Once the paperwork was sent to the necessary
people, I still secretly hoped that my request would be denied by the
university. I know why would they, I requested the LOA for medical reasons, and
I still hold my credits and standing as a senior. But I still wanted some way
out of making the decision I was dreading to make all summer. Even though the
paperwork was done, the final answer from the university to be still
determined, the decision was pretty much made. Did this make me feel any
better? Nope. I didn't feel as though the decision was being forced on me, no one
was standing over me, saying okay what are you going to do, hurrying me up, it
was more of my own hesitation, my own anxiety, my own stress.
After the carpet thing, we still had other things going on. Hubby and
another elder meeting, worship team practice, and family gatherings. On August
24th, the SE PA Deafblind group had their annual picnic at peace Valley Park. Beforehand
there was an advisory meeting for the SSP program. At noon everyone else
started showing up. There was a ton of food, and we had a nice pavilion right
off the water. It was absolutely beautiful weather, not too hot, and not too
cool. The sun was shining, with a nice blue sky. At the picnic SSP were helping
DB folks fill out the application for SSP services. After pigging out on hamburgers
and hot dogs, hubby, myself and a SSP, took a paddle boat ride into the lake. I
chose to sit in the back; this was a four person paddle boat. And I let the men
do all the paddling. There were lots of other people out in their boats, their
canoes, and other paddle boats. I was a little disappointed, because I was not
assigned a SSP, to help with one on one communication, but I still had a great
time. Soon after our paddle boat ride, the SSp who went out with us drove us to
another pavilion for our second act of the day.
On this day the kids went to spend some time with my parents and brother.
They took them out to lunch and then to bowling. While out, they called me. Of
course I had been waiting for their call all day, but then of course as soon as
I get on to the paddle boat, in the middle of the lake, what happens. Yes they
called. And of course here I wore my technology out on to the lake, knowing I
was in a paddle boat that could turn over, while I was wearing my hearing aids,
and other hearing devices. But of course that wonderful technology wasn't
working when the kids called me. So I talked but could not hear them well. They
all thought it was funny for me to tell them we were out in the middle of a
lake. The talks with them were kept very very short.
So the second act of the day was another picnic at peace Valley Park for
our church. For the DB event we were in pavilion 2, for the church picnic we
were in pavilion 4 or 5. We arrived just as everyone was starting to line up to
eat. By this time although we had been at the park all day, had been fairly
active, I was not hungry. We ate because we knew if we had not we would be
super hungry later. We both ate something small, of course every thing was
delicious, and I wish I had more room to eat more.
Soon after eating our small dinner, hubby and I set up to make balloon
animals for the children. We were again the hit of the picnic. It’s a sort of a
running joke now, there are several church members that try to come up with the
oddest animal they can think of, and see if hubby can make it. I can't even
remember what it was this year, but it wasn't an animal people usually request.
Another family, who is also an elder with my hubby, gave us a ride home at
around 7. By this time we had been at the park for 10 hours.
Boy were we tired. Part of what made me tired was just the communication
part of the day. Next time you go someplace, its noisy, lots of activity,
notice how much energy you use to communicate. Then throw into the mix not
hearing well, not seeing, and it’s even more tiring. We were in bed very
shortly after we arrived home, but not only because of the day, but because we
had an early start to our Sunday too.
Our Sunday was normal, church, with a congregational meeting thrown in, and
a family lunch afterwards.
Then came August 26th, classes begin. I thought that I had been so indecisive
all summer, going back and forth on my near future plans, and then the 26th was
upon me. I can't say I handled that day very well. My heart told me that I
should be in school, but my brain said that I was right where I needed to be.
And my heart and brain continued to do this arguing routine thing the rest of
that week. I was down, knowing my university was beginning, knowing that my
fellow classmates were in classes and about to begin internships. I probably
wasn't the easiest person to live with, but I tried to be upbeat around family
and hubby.
And even though I am not sure how it happened, this ends august and now
into September...Where did the summer go? Here I thought I would have all this
time, all this FREE time, yeah right!
Stay Tuned for September..
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